Every year we decide on new years that we’ll do better, we’ll be better and more often than not it doesn’t work out, after which we proceed to the negative talk about oneself and one's abilities to bring about change within ourselves. Sound familiar? It sure does.

Something to realise is that we can’t simply know how to do things, we assume we know and will be able to do so but one flaw we all consist of is doing without learning. First we need to learn how to effectively set goals that will actually benefit us.

Here is how to go about it!

1. Start small: Don’t start with goals that build insanely high expectations of yourself. Set one goal small enough that you know you can manage, it can be as small as drinking more water or getting more sun. The smaller the better and then you slowly move up, it's all a step by step process.

2. Don’t focus on the outcome, rather the process:

Change is slow, change is a process, it requires time and patience but we often get caught up at the reward aspect of getting a goal. It's easy to get caught up imagining the outcome that we forget the process of it, we try to do it altogether and all at once but change comes in small steps, all the small steps eventually lead to the change that you want.

3. Prepare for the inevitable failure:

Often we forget that failure is inevitable, when we think of failure we think of it from such a negative point of where which makes us want to not think about it at all. Change how you think about failure, don’t avoid them but actively think about ways that you might fail and avoid those patterns.

4. Choose a goal that really matters to you:

When setting a goal, take time and really think about it. Think about something that you actually want to change, not a basic generic goal that you see and hear about. Something personal that will inspire and motivate you in times when you feel you want to give up.

It can be as simple as practicing gratitude every morning or giving more hugs to your loved ones. I hope whoever reading this is able to take something out of it because we can learn from anywhere, any time. Enjoy your goal settings!